Happy Hearts

So last October 30 was a mishmash of happenings. First off, I finished Allegiant that afternoon just minutes before I needed to leave, which was the worst idea I've ever had. Now here's a tip: never read a book before going somewhere, especially something as heart-crippling as Allegiant; I was crying the whole time. Now as shattered as I was, the day's events turned my mood for the better.

A day or two before the 30th, Oseo messaged me about a surprise she had for our birthday girl Leigh: a dedication cake and a bouquet of flowers. I'm never one for hastily-made plans because I tend to get very easily anxious about things. Thankfully though the surprise was a success – it always is when it comes to Leigh. After that was just us eating, which isn't really a great story to tell since I'll get hungry and it's the middle of the night and there is no food. Honestly, what's the purpose of the fridge then.

The highlight of the day would have to be the video chats. The first one we had with Jade, our dear friend who is in New Zealand right now and, unfortunately, couldn't celebrate with us (physically anyway). It's been about 3 weeks since she left and this would be the first time we're all together to talk to her – not much talking actually, just a house tour, a dropped laptop and a lot of raised voices. Nonetheless, it was still nice to talk to her and see her too (praise the Lord for Skype). The other one we chatted up was a guy we met in Omegle, Nathan Affleck is his name. A++ personality, super adorable, and very lovable. 10 points for him too for making all of us like him, which is nearly impossible for 9 girls that have very different taste in guys. Congratulations, you are officially UWO's boy candy!

Well, that's it. Semester break is nearly over, just 3 days left and I'll be back in school. And if 2nd semester turns out to be as hectic as the 1st, then I'll probably have less time to update my blog. I'll try my best to though.

Things to be happy about

Haven't updated for a while and that's because the last week has been rather busy(?)/eventful for me, as compared to the rest of my semester break that is. Reasons for it being:

1) Swimming party at Bonifacio Heights

This one we (Yza, Nel and I) have been planning since the start of 1st semester and it was supposed to be an overnight stay, since Nel's family sort of owns the place, but it turned out we couldn't because some actor's mother is temporarily staying at one of the units. I had a lot of fun, though I was only in the water for like 2 hours due to my lack of swimming skills – really, why do I even insist on going swimming – and my fear of getting tanner than I already am. My companions, on the other hand, enjoyed it too much that we stayed 'til the afternoon (note: we came at 8:30AM). After that, and a movie at Nel's house, we set out to Fullybooked The Fort; I have never felt more relaxed and at home than at that moment. Oh, how I missed bookstores.

2) Troublemaker Comeback

2 years. Yes, that is how long I have waited for these two to comeback. A long wait that has been filled with re-watching stage performances and music video, searching pictures in Tumblr, and reading a lot of fanfiction. This comeback though, in my opinion, is better than their debut, and that's saying a lot since their debut was really good and was such a huge success. The song sounds good and is addictive. The concept is cool and (of course) sexy, and they have translated it really well in their music video. I can't help but be proud.

If you like, you can watch the music video here.

3) SS501 Reunion

Now this was definitely the peak of my happy week. The first time I saw the title of the article, I couldn't even believe it, probably because one of them is in the army right now. The five of them standing and performing on the same stage after 3 years of switched companies and solo activities? It was near impossible. But it wasn't really, now was it?

Tears, nonstop tears, those were all I could get out of me (and possibly a lot of wheezing and thank-yous to the Lord). I may be a solid SONE and love SNSD with every fibre of my being, but nothing compares to your first love right? SS501 is that for me: the first group I have ever loved and is the reason why I'm into Kpop; Triple S being my first fandom. It was made even better after reading other fans' comments, especially Cassiopeias, saying how lucky we are and how happy they are for us. It was so precious because even for just a moment, all us fans from different fandoms felt such a rare happiness, one that could only be felt when hit by news that a group has reunited – take Shinwa for example.

4) Seohyun & Kyuhyun's duet at SMTown Tokyo

And just when I thought that everything good has already happened, I find out that my OTP is officially back with a duet. Thank you SM, I have always loved how you pair these two up; it's their 4th duet like what! Sadly though, there aren't any fancams yet – the only thing I'm relying on right now – so I have to patiently wait for it. Anyway, there's an audio already up so that must provide for now.

5) Allegiant

Allegiant is the last book of Veronica Roth's most captivating Divergent series (read now if you haven't), released last October 22. Originally, I planned to buy this on the release date but in a turn of events, I don't have the money for it (and I want to laugh at myself for that right now). It took some blackmailing convincing before my dad agreed to buy me one, and true to his words, he did on the 26th. It's actually very special to me, not just because I have been dying to get the book since forever, but because it is the first time my dad bought me a book. Yes folks, I have shed (not really) blood and tears just to buy my own books. Do you know how much stress I put myself in trying to save money for all those? A lot. I have gone through half of the book and so far I'm loving it, but once I finish it, I will post my review here, as well as on my goodreads page.


So I guess that's it. That's the whole(?) recount of my life for the past few days. There is only a week left until I have to go back to college for 2nd semester, so I have to spend it wisely, which will most likely involve me laying on my bed reading or surfing the internet.

Book Review: Fangirl

I have done a few reviews(up and posted on my Goodreads account) but this would be the first time I'll post one on my blog, so without further ado.

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Title: Fangirl

Author: Rainbow Rowell

Date Read: Oct. 17 - 19

Rating: ★★★★★

I think I'll be saying this for all of her books but it just is true: Rainbow Rowell writes some amazing books. The kind of book that, although is a work of fiction, has such a realistic feeling. The characters are believable. The story is believable. The emotions were all so heartfelt.

Honestly speaking, I wasn't hooked to the story 1/3 of the way in. I didn't get most of what was being said - it was all so hard to understand and take in - and the idea of the story got lost to me. But through the half part I started to understand things and really see what was happening, which kinda sucked because that was when things started falling apart. It felt good though to cheer on Cath through all the shit happening to her. And it felt amazing to see all those problems get resolved: her dad, her sister, Levi, Fiction-writing. It was as if I fixed something in my life every time she got to fix something in hers. That was how realistic it came to me.

The ending, on the other hand, left me dumbfounded. I was surprised that she ended it that way but at the same time could understand why: since young it has always been Wren and Cath in their own bubble, but when Wren decides to come out and explore the world, she was left hiding on her own. A bit later, it explained, in Cath's own words, that there's no need to hide anymore - that she's strong enough for herself to stop hiding. It showed a Cath that was finally brave enough to face the world even without Wren holding her up all the time.

At the end of book, I realized two things: (1)We are all fangirls. May it be crying over a fictional canon from a book or singing along to a band or sitting on the couch in front of the tv cheering on a basketball team or in class admiring the English professor; as long as we have a liking or an admiration to something or someone, we are a fangirl(or fanboy for that matter). And there's no being ashamed to it. Ever. And (2) if you think that you would end up alone in a cottage with 10 cats just because you're weird and socially awkward, then think of what happened to Cath, how she and Levi fell in love, because as much as you think it's impossible, someone out there likes you(may even love you) for being weird and socially inept. And besides, isn't there a song that goes "what makes you different, makes you beautiful"?

Lottery win

Semester break just recently started and I have a pile of books waiting to be read. I don't know which one to read first so I'm just gonna give it up to chance. I made sort of a lottery way of picking. Nothing new, just wanted to try something out.

I don't want to go all philosophical on a simple thing but since I'm a piece shit I'll just go ahead. You know when at first you can't choose which one you want but in the moment you're reaching out to take one strip of paper, there is a voice at the back of your mind telling you something and at that moment you know exactly what you want. When you toss a coin to make a decision and unconsciously you're hoping for one side to turn up while the coin is still flipping. I don't know how that happens but for me it's cool to think that we don't need to worry too much when we're stuck, we just need a little push to make that move.

Decisions and Reasons

Whatever happened to never making a blog is most obviously out the window. It wasn't just the push my friend did, but all the shit happening that made me want to make one. There's the overbearing family, my grades almost slipping, another close friend moving away and my life in general. And I've learned from a lot of books and movies that you can't continue living so closed off from everyone. You can for a while, but it will pile up high, catch up on you and blow up on your face like a big great firework.

I've always thought of myself as someone who has a lot to say and isn't afraid to say it but with everything that's happening, I'm even doubting that. One thing is for sure, I like peace and quiet, and maybe that's why I like to contain not so certain things to myself. But I guess it's about time I hopefully break that silence for good. In here. In a web of complete strangers (and a few friends) because honestly it isn't so bad. It's a great stress reliever, just letting it out and letting it go. Not caring who reads or what they think because this is for me, a healing process of sorts. It is as simple as that. I like it.

PS. I'm not all about life drama. I think that's another shit higher than where I'm at. Or maybe lower. Who knows.